Quentin Crisp (1908-1999)

Denis Charles Pratt was born in Sutton, Surrey, England on 25th December 1908 and a more unremarkable start, considering where his life would take him, you’d be hard-pressed to find.  His father was a solicitor and his mother a former governess and as he himself remarked in his ground-breaking television documentary from 1970, his mother was ‘completely bewildered’ by him.  This however didn’t stop him from embracing who he was totally from the very beginning.

Quentin Crisp (1908-1999)

He was an effeminate child and soon came to realise also a homosexual.  He was bullied at school but things were soon to change as he left school and began to go out into the world.  In his early 20’s he discovered The Black Cat cafe in Old Compton Street, Soho and began to meet other gay men.  He experimented with wearing women’s clothes, applying make-up and even worked for some time as a male prostitute.  He said in a 1999 interview, he did this because he was looking for love (in a time when committing homosexual acts was still illegal) yet found only degradation.

He worked for some time as an engineer’s tracer before finding work as a male model, posing nude for artists in life classes in and around London, something he continued to do for over 30 years.  ‘It was like being a civil servant,’ he explained in his autobiography ‘except that you were naked.’  His outlandish appearance and refusal to hide his homosexuality was both a blessing and a curse because while he courted respect and admiration from some people, he was cruelly snubbed and occasionally beaten up by others.  He felt this was a price to pay though because it was his duty to educate people.

Quentin was already approaching old age when his autobiography The Naked Civil Servant, was published in 1968 and it changed everything for him.  Following on from the book was a documentary about his life made by acclaimed filmmaker Denis Mitchell.  There was also a film in 1975 which starred John Hurt as Quentin and a brilliant portrayal it was too.  Quentin lived out the remainder of his life occasionally acting in films and appearing in commercials as well as performing his one-man show where he would talk candidly about his interesting and colourful life.

Quentin Crisp died on 21st November 1999 just a month shy of his 91st birthday and on the eve of a UK-wide revival of his one-man show.  His is a perfect example of a life well-lived and a refusal to be anything other than what he truly was.  A film entitled An Englishman in New York and which again features John Hurt as Crisp, is set for release soon.  It traces his later years.  Quentin Crisp – a remarkable man, a remarkable life.

Interview: Richard Renaldi’s “Gay and Lesbian Elderly” Series

Richard Renaldi’s “Gay and Lesbian Elderly” series of black and white photographs of gay senior citizens is one of those timeless little collections that lurk in your mind long after you’ve closed the browser. The reason for this, I think, is Richard’s empathy with his subjects. He’s gay and so are they. What he points out eloquently is their dignity. What we need to do, as a community, is simply take more notice of our elders. How many of us bother to seek out mentors and friends older than us these days? Society tells us we’re old at around 50 and anything after that is hardly seen, let alone expressed and portrayed by our news, art and media. While we fight for our own rights, we’re in danger of losing the stories and knowledge of those who struggled before us.

And it’s utter nonsense, isn’t it? We live longer, are healthier and active longer, so why on earth are we as a species discarding people before they’ve even retired from their jobs? Memory is an important part of any tribe, but the world is full and fast these days and tribes get split up and memories lost.

I interviewed Richard online about his very worthwhile project.

How do you envisage your own old age?
Hopefully with my partner of 10 years and as independent and active as possible.

What steps do you think need to be taken in order to improve the visibility of the elderly gay population?
More people coming out. More images of elderly gay & lesbians in the media – including advertising, film, and television. More images of elderly in the general population as well. And more respect given to our elders by younger people. I hear far too often when asking to photograph an elderly person ” why would you want to photograph me I’m old” I think many elderly people are beautiful and it makes me sad to hear them express this negative self-image.

The first few photographs of your series seem to me to show vulnerability in the subjects – did they seem vulnerable to you when you met them?
Not particularly. Perhaps the elderly black man Robert seems more vulnerable in the photograph of him. I remember him having a more subdued, mellow personality.

There’s pride evident in your photographs too – did you talk to your subjects about gay pride at all?
Yes. They were all very out and proud. Self-assured and knew who they were. Many of them had interesting stories to tell about how much things had changes and how much “us kids” took for granted.

You wanted to show the dignity of old age – in the process of finding people to take photographs of, did you have to reject any for not having a dignified appearance or did everyone have an inherent dignity?
Dignity is really not something you can give to a person but I think it is something that you can capture and reveal in how you approach that person and how you treat them.

What kind of feedback have you had to the photographs?
Very positive. I have given these images out many many times over the years to different organizations to help raise awareness and visibility in regards to LBGT Senior issues.

Do you still have any contact with the people you photographed?
No longer. My partner and I become friends with the elderly couple William and Roy but they moved into an assisted living facility out of state a few years ago and we lost touch…

Interview: Ulla Kelly

Hunting the Elderdyke

iDyke column on Queerlife.co.za by Ulla Kelly

Years ago, when I wrote another column for another website, I used to bleat often, “Where are the elderdykes?” At that stage I was about 30 and didn’t know any lesbians much over 45. All my whining got two responses and I had a drink with a really cool fifty something in Cape Town, and got lectured by a lovely sixty something in KZN, about the responsibility of us young dykes towards their elders. Well, I couldn’t agree more. In fact, I think we all have a responsibility towards each other.

We need the elderdykes, because they have stories to tell and advice to give. Society as a whole seems to write off the elderly and it makes no sense. People are living longer and staying healthier for longer, so why do we suddenly assume someone is irrelevant as soon as their hair is grey? Selfishly, I imagine a youth where I’d have had an elderdyke to confide in. No doubt I’d have ignored most of her advice and made all the same mistakes anyway, but I think it might have made the world feel a little safer. It’s good to know survivors of the same kind of crap you’re going through.

Sadly, I moved away from KZN, so never managed to connect properly with the active and interesting group of elderdykes there – I almost said ‘retired lesbians’ then thought no, they didn’t give lesbianism up, now did they? A shout out to Out on Sunday – you guys rock! Another shout out to the Lesbian Elders Village in New Zealand, who dream in lego. (They also willing to share their knowledge and experience with anyone who’s interested in starting a similar community.)

Since then, I’ve moved a lot and my contact with elderdykes has improved; but I’m still looking for that mentor. Of course, I’m assuming someone would want the role and that’s not necessarily the case. I can be rather trying, apparently.

Some countries, notably the USA, the UK, Australia and New Zealand, have resources aimed at the senior gay population. As far as I know, we have none, but I’d be delighted to be proved wrong. Old age isn’t a purely gay issue, even if you’re gay, but it’s a universal issue and as a community, how are we addressing it?

If anybody needs me I’ll be on the trail of the lesbian Voortrekkers.  Comfortably shod over the Drakensberg, anyone?

Lesbian Elders Village, Auckland NZ

LEV (Lesbian Elders Village. Auckland Inc) has recently become an Incorporated Society, and has formed a committee and now a number of working groups. We are really hopeful of reality evolving from our dreams of creating a village on the outskirts of Auckland, where lesbians can live safely and with independence and company. We have recently had a meeting with Maryan Street (Housing Minister) and with a number of contact people she suggested, to explore the next steps of finding and acquiring land that we can afford. We need the land before we can build the houses!

The most recent weekend was a time to translate our many dreams into concrete (or plastic and moss). We spent three hours at different stages of the weekend building our dream village on a table top. In the conversation we discovered some of the things that mattered to each of us, and found how accepting we each were of one another’s hopes. So our ‘dream’ village has space for gardens, a swimming pond, a sauna. It accommodates house buses, and visitors; dogs and cats; a health centre and a sacred space. The accommodation could range from ‘terraced’ two storied houses with private gardens to small affordable one person units to buy or rent. It may also involve accommodation with 24 hour care, and one of the working groups is considering this possibility.

Over the weekend we also created a time-line of the various stages for creating the village. We then became extremely realistic and put times and dates on different stages, such as finding the land, getting planning consent, planting the first trees, and finally moving in to the first houses. We included projected dates for parties, and for making different degrees of commitment.

We imagine women living there when they are partnered and when they are single. They may choose to live in relative independence or to take advantage of opportunities to be more active members of a community. We hope that we can live there when we are well, and also when we have more need for support. If we have caring family they will be able to visit us in a place where they know we are happy, accepted and in the company of friends. They will not need to worry about our isolation or inappropriate care.

We really encourage questions and/or involvement from any lesbian who is interested in some kind of community to live in as they grow older, and who would like to see some better choices for lesbians as they grow older. Please contact us with any questions. Talk to someone you know who is involved. Check out our website or email us.

.
Article by Jan for LEV Auckland

Should we come out to the elderly?

I found the above question examined at an online lesbian magazine and thought it would be interesting to look at it from its flipside; remembering that “the elderly” mentioned in their article are actually not always heterosexual.

Please comment here or there or in both places.

WordPress posts re gay seniors

Evecho asks where are the gay seniors?

The gay recluse corresponds with an 80 yr old autistic gay man.

Gay activist talks about being old, lonely, gay and ignored.

Richard Renaldi’s photography project features gay and lesbian seniors

Richard Renaldi’s photography project of portraits of gay and lesbian seniors can be found here.

Gay and Lesbian Aging

Gay and Lesbian Aging

Linda M. Woolf, Webster University

Social service workers are becoming increasingly aware that there exists a large population of older gay and lesbian individuals. Estimates range from 1.75 to 3.5 million older gay men and lesbians in the United States. To put these figures in perspective, this is approximately equal to or two times greater than the number of older adults living in a nursing home setting. As this population has been little studied or even acknowledged to exist, few programs are provided to meet the special needs of these individuals.

More on this article can be found here.

Advocates address challenges of gay seniors

Frank Carter

(10-19) 04:00 PDT New York — Frank Carter was once a globe-trotting professional dancer; his world is smaller now. He battles multiple health problems, walks with a cane and rarely leaves his compact Manhattan apartment.

As an 86-year-old gay man, with no family nearby and many acquaintances long since dead, he’d seem a likely prospect for isolation.

“The other guys in the hospital, no one was coming in to see them,” Carter said. “To get that gift, you have to be lucky.”

It’s not just luck. Stoll came into his life though a program that matches infirm gay men and lesbians with volunteers who commit to making weekly visits.

The full story can be found here.

Pink Sunset Villa: A Home for Gay and Lesbian Elders

A film by Tjarda Hockstra

Growing old presents its challenges to everyone, but many elderly gay and lesbian people have the added problem that they do not feel at home in facilities for “straight” people. This gentle film, made in Holland, shows us the evolution of a home being built for senior gays and lesbians. It introduces us to the graying men and women as they prepare to distill their possessions and their memories for the move to spacious cheery apartments in the new residence.

Each speaks of his or her journey to self recognition. Being gay or lesbian was deeply disturbing in their youth. Indeed, although they eventually found friends, they all speak of being somewhat wary of their straight neighbors. For years each had to keep secret from friends and family their “other” life.

These men and women now have passed over a new “threshhold”, not only in their residence, but in their comfort and pride in being who they are. As one man says “I’m homosexual and I’m going to live my last days that way!”

Subtitled

Length:	50 min
Released:	2003